Category: Crackpots

Lou Reads Confessions from Confessionpost.com

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Guys…. I’m sorry… have something to confess… One time…

This is the worst confession I have ever heard... I know its going to haunt me!!!!

Well, you probably get the idea of this episode. It’s all kinds of confessions. I was originally going to split the episode between two different confession sites but as it turned out, one was enough. Real stories? People wasting time on the intertubes? I read. You decide.

As promised here is this episodes EXTRASODE: HOW THE INSANE CLOWN POSSE SAVED MY SOUL BUT ALSO MADE ME WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH TWO FORTY YEAR OLDS.

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Okay, my debt is paid. Back to the beach. I am on vacation after all…

Well deserved vacation is in effect

Lou Reads from Creepy Hollow: A Place for Spirit Keeping, Spell Casting and Other Nonsense.

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I know I am going to come under psychic attack for this episode but so be it. I have my harpies at the ready!

UH...Okay Bird Lady... Whatever You Say...

So this forum is for people who believe hardcore in the paranormal and hidden world. We’re talking spells. We’re talking spirits. We’re talking black magicks. The whole kit’n’kaboddle. So please imagine me in a healing glow and pray a special pray (with special double luck candle) for me as I delve into the forums of Creepy Hollows

EXTRA BONUS CONTENTAROONY!


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Thanks for listening! Don’t forget to share Lou Reads with everyone you know!


Old Lou Reads Episodes on YouTube in Video Style Watchables

Early on in Lou Reads history I attempted making “Enhanced” podcasts in GarageBand. That basically means adding photos to the audio file. That way people who are listening and staring at their iPods or whatever can see something, too! Well I gave up on it because it had to be an m4a file instead of mp3 and I figured that might cause some problems. Anyway, I found the old ones and realized that I could just export them as a Quicktime and toss them up on YouTube. So thats what I did. Hooray.

Lou Reads from the PeeSearch Forums.

Lou Reads Salvia Trip Reports.

In other news it looks like Lou Reads will be appearing on RedditRadio’s talk channel in the very near future. Due to that I’ll be needing to change the intro music. Try not to be too jarred by the music change!

New, not-old-episode-made-into-a-video, coming up soon!


Lou Reads: Tales of Being Creepy from Ask Reddit

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You asked for it and now you got it. I have finally ventured into the wilds of Reddit to search out something good to read! Thanks to the many suggestions of you loyal listeners I was able to bypass the one million imgur images submitted daily and found some great stuff. So in this inaugural Reddit Lou Reads we’ll be hearing the true tales of Redditors admitting their own creepy behaviors.

The Post That Revealed 1000 Creeps

Images related to the podcast! Can you tell which story they are from?

Young Unrequited Love for a 45 Year Old
There is no excuse for this...

Thanks to listener John Jackson for showing me the SA thread about Reddit to help me get started and find some good stuff!

Lou Reads from the Forums of FemaleFirst.Co.Uk (NSFW)

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Finally a place for ladies to go and talk about lady stuff. EWW! Well not just lady stuff… really people go to FemaleFirst.Co.UK to talk about all kinds of dumb stuff. And you can rest assured that they are talking a ton! I barely even scratched the surface and there was so much more to read. It’ll have to wait for another time and I promise there will be another time. Keep being crazy, people.

I'd be more impressed if those were places you pooped.

Meanwhile, I hope you enjoy this episode of Lou Reads and as promised, your bonus content. It involves the delightful story of a brother and sister who decide to have babies together and all the details of how they went about it. Its really… special?

Finally, please take some time and visit Lou Reads Official Sponsor Adam & Eve. Thy have a ton of amazing deals on great sex toys, movies and more. Use the code LOUREADS when you check out and you’ll save 50% off almost any item! Three Free Adult Movies DVD a Free Gift and Free Shipping! Check’em out!
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Super finally: The band BATTLES put some of my videos in their YOUTUBE PLAYLIST. Big ups to BATTLES for exposing their fans to my videos. Now if I can only talk them into letting me read for them live to open their shows!

Lou Reads from the forums of CumOnFood.net

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Welcome! Welcome to the forum that made me feel like puking every step of the way. That’s right! You heard it here first! As you’ll soon hear I thought I might have met my match here in the bowels of the CumOnFood.net forums. That’s right. A forum… about people… who want to cum on food and eat it or have other people eat it…

THAT IS WHAT YOU THINK IT IS… PERMISSION TO VOMIT GRANTED

I won’t belabor the point. This episode is gross! I hope you find the strength to make it to the end and I apologize in advance if it makes you vomit. This episode is so that I recommend not eating while listening.

As promised, here is the extra gross Extra Content!
First, the photo that made me cry for my brain…

A Giant Jar Full of Jizz…. BLECH!!!!

And second, the extra readings from the forum… Enjoy… if that’s the right word for what is happening here… I am no longer sure…

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Lou Reads the Discussions at Tea Party Nation

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Oh Brother… Where to begin… My understanding of the “Tea Party” is that it was started to express outrage at Government spending and taxation deemed out of control. Why this only popped up once Obama was in office and not during the Bush years when the spending was out of control is beyond me. Please don’t suggest its because he’s black. THAT WOULD BE CRAZY!

Yes, I hate American so much I want to be in charge of its demise!

Anyway, so there are a lot of these forums out in sigh-berspace but I chose this one for no particular reason. Its full of the usual nonsense that you find on the White Power sites. Especially sad is their constant pining for the “good old days” which are invariably the 1950’s & 60’s. Equally sad is the seemingly endless amount this junk is driven by religious dogma and just the same flailing to hold onto a bygone way of life. All this culminates in the most delicious nonsensical rage possible.

Here's the "Real" Truth: You Need A Therapist.

Enough dissecting this nonsense. Won’t you please enjoy Lou Reads the Forums of Tea Party Nation…

Bonus material: I had to join this horrible Tea Party site for the next episode of my podcast. This lady sent me a video with the following message:

I’m new to TPN so I thought I would start trying to get to know like-minded folks on here. A friend of mine, who’s a comedienne, and I are “underground” Conservatives in Hollywood…that can be a real treat as I’m sure you can imagine! Nice to e-meet you! If you’re on Facebook as well, check out The Right View Undercover and if you’d like to have a laugh, here’s our video we shot at a Union march/rally downtown LA!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyGm9tHBf1w

I defy you to have a laugh at anything in this video… All the classic reasons why Conservative humor falls flat.


Lou Reads: A Forum for Adults Who Love My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

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Hay Everypony! I don’t want to hear any neighsaying about this episode of Lou Reads. I really got my hooves dirty on this one. Sure its not about gross sex, removing your balls or teen vampires but for me there is something inherently creepy about adults who get so bananas for a cartoon about . Now, these people set up this nice new forum so they could escape from persecution at a less tolerant forum. Sadly someone told me about it and I decided to read all about it. Now, in the name of fairness I’m including an episode of the MLP:FiM in this post. See if you can resist the allure of the cuteness of… of… PONIES!

As you’ll find out in the podcast there are quite a few people who are crazy about this cartoon! And as promised I found a horrible post to read for you guys from one of the other forums. Warning: This story is really a downer on many levels. However it does involve in a very odd way. I don’t know if “Enjoy” is the right term… but its all I got. ENJOY!

Thanks for stopping by the blog! Make sure your rate the show on iTunes and tell everyone you know that they need to hear all about the stuff they didn’t want to know about. It builds character!


Lou Reads from the Forums of Eunuch Archive

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Hi boys and girls! If you’re like me, you hate your balls, or your cock, or both your cock and balls. Right? So what are we going to do about that? Well if you’re like the people on this forum you might put said private parts right up in this little beauty above. Not your style? Then maybe you’d like to dip your dick in some liquid nitrogen? Or perhaps something you come up with on your own innovative to remove your twig and berries! Exciting times for those who no longer want the parts they came with!

Won’t you please enjoy listening to Episode 67 of Lou Reads the Internet for YOU! The Eunuch Archives. DO NOT WATCH THE VIDEO EMBED IN THE POST IF YOU FIND COCK REMOVAL UNSETTLING!

Hey! Want to know more about the great idea of removing your dong and coconuts? Consider getting some amazing Eunuch Items at Amazon!

Lou Reads: Craziness from the 11:11 Angels Forums

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This episode of Lou Reads the Internet for YOU! deals specifically with people who believe that angels, celestial teachers and other things are trying to contact us through our digital clocks. That’s right. If you happen to look over at your clock and see 11:11 or any other double number or numbers in sequence thats not just you seeing a number that happens twice a day! You’ve been touched by an angel!

Time to Get Your Clock Fixed!

So, yeah. If you really want to read into seeing something then this is the forum for you. Not only that but this forum has like so seriously amazingly bananas theories about all kinds of nonsense. I can’t even get into how utterly loopy it is. I tried to read some of the explanatory stuff but it just got to be too much. Wait until you learn that we live on the 606th planet called Uranita in the System of Satania!!! I know, its almost too much to fathom! Anyway, won’t you please enjoy Lou Reads the forums of 1111angels.com

Yeah... I know... I'm mean...