Sex Stories – Lou Reads the Internet for YOU!

Lou Reads 182 – Deep in the Pits of Armpit-Fetish.com

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Greetings, friends and those interested in the more obscure parts of the internet. This months episode is a visit to the fabulously spam-destroyed pages of Artpit-Fetish.com. This site was once the home of a small number of folks that really liked armpits more than most people (if people think about armpits at all.) Now, sadly, the forums are almost 99% spambots with the occasional lonely armpit lover trying to call out in the void…

According to some guy in this episode, the following video sparked a life long obsession about masturbating to men’s armpits. See if you can spot any particularly erotic pits! Specifically, Kenny Chesney’s wild underarm action is what drove the gentleman in question wild. Please, try to control your own feverish self-pleasure urges when watching it!

Lou Read Ep181 Bonus – Learn Prostate Massage Again and Again!

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Are you feeling the protrusion yet? Please enjoy this episode about milking your prostate. If you don’t know how to milk your prostate by the end of this episode then you just aren’t trying very hard…

Lou Reads ep 181 – The Spicy Talk Forums

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

As a married man who hates breasts I could not get down with this forum. I mean, who likes breasts? Especially breasts full of milk that are being shared with lots of grown dudes and ladies looking for some kind of Adult Nursing Relationship? Oh right, the people who used to hang out at Spicy Talk Forums!

Ok, I was lying. I don’t really hate breasts. Please don’t send me hate mail and pictures of your breasts to let me know how angry you all are at me. Reading this forum was fairly funny because of how almost every thread somehow got around to talking about adult breastfeeding… In the end I decided to just double down on all the ANR talk and accept the concept that there are a lot of people out there who think about drinking mothers milk ALL THE TIME… I hope you enjoy it!

I am planning a small bit of bonus content in a week. Keep your ears posted!

Lou Reads ep177 Tales of Escorts First Clients from Reddit

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Hey, I know we just has sex and that I paid you for that sex because you’re an escort. But, I really feel that in this 10 minute encounter that we’ve bonded and I’d really like to see you again. And, also have sex with you again for money. But, maybe you’ll kind of be into me next time a little and give me a discount and eventually you’ll see that, although we met via an exchange of sex for cash, that I’m a super nice guy! And maybe you’ll want to date me and have sex with me for free because we’ll be dating! Wouldn’t that be awesome?! Oh, but don’t tell my wife…

I’m different than all the other guys you’re fucking. I’m a nice guy!

The world of escorting appears to be less awful from the world of street sex workers. However, every sex worker who trades sex for cash has to have a first time that they did it. That’s what is happening this episode of Lou Reads. I hope you enjoy hearing these stories!

Lou Reads ep173 – SOLO SUCK FORUMS

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

I’m not doing myself any favors by reading from the forums of Solo Suck. I knew it would be tough to read and yet, I persisted. Just like Elizabeth Warren! Except instead of standing up to the GOP I stood up to my own stomach and challenged it with some seriously nauseating content.

Yes, that is what you think it is from the episode. All rights reserved by the guy who saved all his cum to make it into an egg…

Now, like many forums I read, this forum is just another example of people who aren’t hurting anyone engaging in a sex hobby they feel passionate about. However, it’s hard not to be grossed out by this act that is so taboo and generally frowned on. Of course there is some modicum (no pun intended) of hypocrisy for being grossed out in a world where pornography is all about women & men being the semen targets. However, the act of self-sucking & the raising cum to a fetishized sacrement… well, I personally had some trouble with queasiness reading it. I hope that you’ll enjoy this episode. I know it may be difficult and in some ways mentally damaging but… Well, I hope you enjoy it if you can keep your food down…

Lou Reads ep 170 – Meet Fighters: A One Stop Shop for Boxing, Wrestling & Boner Lovers

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Hey there! I was just thinking about you! Oh, I was just thinking that you should come over, have a couple of drinks and then, I don’t know, take off your clothes and wrestle me to see who gives who a blowjob. You know, just normal guy stuff. Where’d I learn about this? Oh, MeetFighters.com of course! It’s a great place to go and talk about how horny fighting makes you. I mean me. But maybe you? No? Okay… Well… thanks for dropping off my mail.

Someone, somewhere totally got a boner about this image.

So… I will admit to having been a boxing fan at some point in my life. However, I have to clarify that not once during my watching dudes beat the shit out of each other for money did I ever get an erection. Well, the same can’t be said for many of the men found on Meet Fighters. These men love fighting and being naked and maybe even… just maybe… forcing the loser of their own fights to perform sexual acts. Sound like something you’d like to do? Well then by all means go ahead and check out the site. Not your bag? Well then enjoy listening to the odd topics discussed in this episode of Lou Reads!

By the way, the t-shirt store is open again for another brief window! Get yourself a Lou Reads T-Shirt today!

Lou Reads ep164 – Return to FetLife Mountain: The Destroyed Pussy Adventure.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Fetlife, short for “Fetish Life” (I’m assuming), is an online forum for kinksters of all varieties. If you’re vanilla (aka a normal sex person) then you probably don’t want to go there. However, if you’re into something… unusual… or just plain fucked up sexual weirdness, this is place for you!

That firecracker really did a number on your pussy! Good job!

While I enjoy reading from Fetlife because it is full of all manner of super candid sexual absurdity, it is a very supportive and rational kind of absurdity. If I knew someone was having trouble finding people who want to talk about destroying their tits or wanted to find out where to go to talk about giving women orgasms via throat fucking, well, Fetlife would have to be the first place I’d recommend. Lucky for me I’m rather vanilla so no eating piss soaked dog food in my future. But hey, whatever floats your boat! I hope your enjoy the episode.

Lou Reads – Ep 162 The Forums of SexInfo101.Com

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Hey guys & gals. I’m ashamed to ask you about this but… if I put my pee pee in a girls woo woo, can she get hypnotized by my sperms? She can? Wow, thanks internet. You saved me some grief!

Me-sa-vagina going to drain you-sa ball balls so good, yes?

So this months episode is a trip into the forums of sexinfo101.com. It’s the typical kind of place where people ask questions they should have learned the answers to when they were kids. Sadly, thanks to the United States stupid Puritanical fear of sex & pleasure, there are a lot of people out there who are just in the dark. Luckily for them they have a place like Sex Info 101 to help guide them through the mysterious world lurking inside their pants. And, as usual, there are a lot of weird or lost people out there. Join me in exploring the fascinating world of Sex Info 101.

Lou Reads Ep159 – The Sissy Babies of Sissy Kiss

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Hewoe. I’m a witty, bitty baby. Won’t you put a bwutt pwug in my bum bum? Fank-oo berry much. Me wuv oo…

Hey Dad, where are the keys to the… Oh… I see you’re busy… I’ll.. uhh. ask mom…

Hey Mom, Dad is doing he weird baby shit. Do you know where the keys to the… Oh…Ah… I see you’re busy, too… I’ll.. go buy heroin and kill myself…

Ok… So… Adult babies meets humilation fetish in a meeting of the oddness. This fits into the Alex Shaw, from School of Movies, fetish danger scale firmly in the “Weird but not harming anyone” category. In theory I understand the concept of baby regression and wanting to be taken care of but I totally do NOT get the whole humiliation thing. Life sucks enough without having to pretend to be an emasculated baby man in a diaper with a cage on your dick and plug up your ass. But as long as you’re doing that at home then go bananas. This may be unkind but I pray this never becomes accepted enough that people do it public. I don’t think I could contain my scorn… I apologize for being judgy but… yeah… Unless it was Trump…

Here is the link to The Something Awful Weekend Web that launched a thousand dirty nappies. I seriously used to look forward to trying to find the dumbest things on every forum I went on. I have to admit I was pretty good at it! *humblebrag*

And here’s a link to the The F Plus episode I mention on the podcast. 63: Achtung! Adult Babies! I seriously recommend listening to the baby talk story. I remember walking down the street laughing with a pained look on my face. So good.

Thanks for listening everyone!

Lou Reads ep157 Canadian Escort Reviews

Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed

Subscribe: RSS

Prostitutes, who doesn’t love them? I mean, who doesn’t love them as long as they give a full & real Girlfriend Experience and don’t try to rip me off and look at me while we’re fucking! How am I supposed to fool myself into thinking you are enjoying this if you won’t look at me? LOOK AT MEEEEE!!!

Nothing sadder than a hooker looking for a handout.

The weird and wonderful world of escort lovers. I’m sure you’ll all recall when I read from the English escort review site PUNTERNET. Well, I thought it was time that I read about some of the great ladies of the evening from the Great White North. So strap on your headphones and get ready to hear some tales of the amazing & not so amazing sex workers of Canada!