What’s the matter? You look like you came down with a case of fin rot! Come on you can share your feelings with me. Catfish got your tongue? Ok, well you don’t have to tell me what your deal is but if you feel like talking about it I recommend checking out the forums of The MerNetwork.

This photo didn't even come close to making me reconsider anything besides getting on the internet today...

This photo didn’t even come close to making me reconsider anything besides getting on the internet today…

This episode is all about the wonderful world of the MerMaiding community. I’ll bet you thought it was all about people who wish they were really MerMaids or debate the possibility of there being REAL mermaids in the depths of the ocean. Nope, it’s just some folks talking about dressing up like a half-fish and flopping around in pools. I’ll bet you feel like a real asshole now. Serves you right. Enjoy!

{ 0 comments }

Ok, I admit I meant to push you off that cliff but I really didn’t mean for you to get THAT hurt. I guess in hindsight it should have been more obvious that a 300 foot drop may have resulted in multiple contusions. Again, my bad. But look at it this way. In 30 years, if you pull through, we are going to laugh & laugh. You might even get a fun nickname like “Old Falling Jim” and I might get called something like “Pusherman.” We don’t have to go with those ideas but, you know, just think about it. Ok, visiting hours are over so I’ll catch you later. Whatever you do, don’t die… Mom would be hella pissed at me if you do. Ok, later, little bro!

THIS IS A FUN GAME WE ARE PLAYING! SAY IT!

THIS IS A FUN GAME WE ARE PLAYING! SAY IT!

I don’t know if this is a good representation of the kind of posting that happens at the Fark.com forums but it is as close as I’m going to get for the time being. This episode is a collection of mostly fun stories of kids getting injured by or injuring their siblings. If you have a brother or sister (however they present their gender today) you’ll most likely have at least a few similar stories in your mental roladex. I’m sure my brother could make his own podcast about what a complete asshole I was to him growing up. Sigh… Anyway, I hope you enjoy this break from the wretchedness of the episodes of the recent past. I know I needed a break from the awfulness! Next month I’ll be back to the horrors. Until then, enjoy the show!

{ 1 comment }

Look, we’re all a little racist, right? We all dabble in little stereotypes we think are based in reality. You know, like all Puerto Ricans are carrying at least 2 knives at all times or black people don’t tip or that filipino people’s livers can be used to cure AIDS. I’m sure we’ve all said that last one. But, I’m sure we can all agree that really, all we want to do is complain about African Americans. Like, all the time. It’s nice to know that there is a place you can go on the internet to hang out with like minded people and just pour all your super bad feelings about African Americans in a terrible echo chamber for like-minded bigots. That place is of course Shit Skin Plantation.

I'm not going to lie. Reading this nonsense sucked.

I’m not going to lie. Reading this nonsense sucked.

Shit Skin is a new home for the people who used to post openly super racist things at the now defunct Chimp Out website. While not as busy a site as Chimp Out, Shit Skin is still full of virulent uber racism. FUN! I won’t lie, reading from this website was unpleasant and although I have a few similar sites in my spreadsheet I will probably take a break from reading anything so over the top as far as using the N-Word is concerned!

Enjoy!

{ 22 comments }

Hey, it happens to everyone, right? You get in the shower, you realize you need to poop. Now you have a choice, get out and have a weird wet poop on the toilet or just have a sensical dump right there in the shower. Oh… that doesn’t happen to everyone? Uh… yeah.. me neither.

I'm glad this sign exists or I would be shitting in the shower every morning.

I’m glad this sign exists or I would be shitting in the shower every morning.

This episode was a pretty entertaining silliness. My own story of shower pooping (a complete accident) was part of a time in my life when I had constant irritable bowel syndrome issues. I won’t go into details but it was gross… Anyway, I hope you enjoy the episode. Ironically, I’m stuck home editing this because I have some kind of super terrible stomach flu! Blehhh.

Now watch this video. It is the best.

{ 4 comments }

Oh my God, dude. Last week I was so wrecked. Dude, you would not believe it. I took so many drugs! How many? Like this many!

I took 5 reds, 3 blues, a hit of tan and smoked a banana peel.

I took 5 reds, 3 blues, a hit of tan and smoked a banana peel.

What is the deal with 1p-LSD? Anyway, I always enjoy reading the stories of peoples silly (scary) adventures in altered states. Most of these are not THAT bad but they are still entertaining. I hope you find them so.

Best Vape Prices

Hey, buy your next vape at PuffitUp! Great service & Prices!

Screen Shot 2016-02-23 at 12.25.52 AM

{ 3 comments }

Hey guys, so I was at the club last night and there was this A.D.D Girl there who I was pretty sure was DTF. So I initiated EC and eventually got #close. I’m feeling pretty good about the possibility to turn this into a FClose by the end of the week.

1377626265tumblr_me6e2tO8IV1rieeh3o1_500

If you understood any of that then you’re probably a pick-up artist. Congrats! If not well I hope you’re ready to learn all about this interesting dating system developed at Manwhore.org. Generally, this website is yet another Pick Up Artist (PUA) system with the difference being that it focuses around using texting to get girls to give you a shot. At least thats what I got from it in my brief experience there. Does it work? I have no idea. But in this episode of Lou Reads you’ll hear the trials & triumphs of the users of this Manwhore system. I hope you enjoy it.

{ 1 comment }

Hey, I know this is weird, but I have a confession to make. Sometimes I go on the internet and write anonymous confessions about super mundane things I do in my life that no one cares about. Like, how I took out the trash today and then thought about how we’re ruining this planet with our trash. What’s that you say? You kind of do the same thing? Oh, that’s cool. Like what kind of stuff do you write about? Oh, you write about how you fucked your sister and are cheating on your wife by giving blow jobs to strangers by the bus load? Huh… well what site are you posting them on? Naughtyposts.com? Well, what do you know. Me, too!

Bad, dog. You've been posting your stupid incest fantasies on the internet again , haven't you...

Bad, dog. You’ve been posting your stupid incest fantasies on the internet again , haven’t you…

Not much to be said about this episode. It’s basically people submitting stories about every kind of supposed naughty thing you can confess about it. Is any of it real? I’ll leave that distinction up to you for mine is not to judge but rather to read.

Thanks for listening to another stupid year of the the Internet being read for YOU! I sincerely appreciate it. See you in 2016!!!

Happy New Year 2015 Animated GIF Images

{ 1 comment }

Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to step back into the store. Would you mind taking off your jacket? Sir, I don’t care if it was a gift from your mother. I’m more concerned with the 10 pairs of FUBU hoodies you’ve concealed in your shirt. Oh, I suppose someone else jammed them in there. Great.

I know what will help me forget my shoplifting conviction. Stealing this bottle of booze!

I know what will help me forget my shoplifting conviction. Stealing this bottle of booze!

There are a lot of sources for information about shoplifting and I’m very proud you chose to come here to learn. Why, by following the advice in this episode of the podcast you should have a nice little crime record. Don’t get me wrong. You’ll also have some stolen clothes. It’s totally worth going to all the trouble to steal all your clothes. Yup. Not being sarcastic. Nope.

SUPPORT LOU READS! REMEMBER TO BUY YOUR HOLIDAY AMAZON PURCHASES THROUGH MY LINK!

{ 3 comments }

Lou Reads ep143 Random Topics from the Forums of Bodybuilding.com

November 5, 2015

Are you looking to get ripped? Need shed some pounds? Do you need a safe place to talk about why if homosexuality is ok then incest should be okay, too? Well you might benefit from reading the forums at bodybuilding.com. Not only is Bodybuilding.com a great place to learn about your physical wellbeing, it’s a […]

Read the full article →

Lou Reads episode 142 – Intactivism from the forums of Restoring Foreskin

September 14, 2015

I really don’t want to share any images related to this episode. Circumcision is a controversial topic. For me it’s a Star-Bellied Sneeches thing. “They have extra skin on thars!” If you didn’t know about foreskin would you miss it? Well, these guys would and they do. On the other hand the reasons for circumcision […]

Read the full article →