Lou Reads about Sucky Customers and the Sucks who Serve them at CustomersSuck.com

You know… I once thought that everyone who has a job loves the job and is grateful for the customers who come in and make that job possible. Oh, what a dreamer I was. Full of grand ideas about how the world worked and free trade economic policies…

If more customers did this then I could understand why people felt so angry towards them. Of course if you did the opposite no one would shop at your store. Classic Catch 22....

Then I got a job and realized that customers, for the most part, kind of suck. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I am a customer, too. I try really hard not be a bad customer. I don’t haggle, I don’t smell, I don’t do any of the things people on this forum complain about. I AM THE PERFECT CUSTOMER! Oh wait, I do the thing where I come in and get all the info then buy online… crap… I got too full of myself… and now I’ve paid the price for my hubris… I apologize. Look, my shift is almost over so if you don’t mind I’m just going to shut the register down and get some Dunkin Donuts and go home and cry…

While you imagine me crying and eating glazed donuts (such salty sweetness) won’t you please enjoy Lou Reads from the forums of Customers Suck dot com

2 Shots to the Dome!

Hey guys and gals, another non-podcast related posting. I just wanted to drop a quick note to update you on stuff I’ve been working on. First is commercial I just finished recording last week. I’ve been told its on the air but I haven’t seen it yet.

Then I did something for Blizzcon. If you don’t know what it is it’ll be obvious after you watch the video. It’s a huge online gaming nerd fest.

It’s been a busy November! I know if you belong to the Facebook page you already saw these but not everyone is as eager to share their personal info with the social network as you FB’rs. Now its back to working on the podcast for you rowdy lot, once again.

Lou Reads tales of Bad Roommates

Look, I’ve had it with you. You are a terrible person to live with! You’re a slob! You stink! You won’t let my friends have sex in your room when you’re out of town! Really, you are the worst person I’ve ever lived with and when this lease runs out in 10 months I am out of here unless you move out then I wouldn’t mind taking over your room…

Photo illustration by Tyler Metcalfe/The Daily
Do you mind if I practice my guitar while you sleep?

Bad roommates are like a test from the universe. My question is what do bad roommates get out of living with good roommates? I mean besides living like the filthy inconsiderate bastards they are without consequence, of course. Now, I’ll admit that in my life I’ve been a bad roommate at times. Mainly due to my extremely privileged upbringing where I was taught that I am better than most people. I’ll just say that I’m glad that the internet was not a huge deal when I was in college or surely my name would have been in this podcast, too!

I just stand by the fact that no matter how bad I was as roommate I was never as bad as the infamous “Fecal Lasagna” Roommate.

For the record making a bathtub full of poop and newspapers does make you a bad roommate.

Thanks to the Something Awful goons for all their tales of roommate woe!

Hey, I’m Busy!

Hey Podcast Pals!

Sorry for another slight delay in the semi-irregular schedule of Lou Reads podcasts. The end of October was pretty crazy for me! As you can see I traveled to the Rally to Restore Sanity. On the way down my friend and
I consumed a can of Four Loko to see what all the hubbub was about.

Suffering Through A Can of Four Loko
It tastes like garbage juice mixed with gasoline and it will get you disturbingly drunk very quickly!
After that we went to the rally it was a lot of fun
Holy People! So Many People!!!
Then I had to hurry home from DC and get my kids costumes all ready for Halloween… No Four Loko was consumed.
Cuteness Robotified

Add on top of that whole mess of stuff to do that I just booked a voice over job doing a national commercial for Cuisinart and man… I am busy! I’ve got a couple of days off so I am going to try and punch a podcast out for you lovely lovers of Lou (Reads) and post it as soon as I can.

MOST IMPORTANTLY: VOTE IN FAVOR OF STUFF I CARE ABOUT TOMORROW! Don’t be an apathetic loser. Throw your vote in the vote hole. Do it. TTYL!