Lou Reads: All About Marrying the Russian Girl of Your (Bad) Dreams

by King Lou on September 17, 2010

A wise man once said, “To make a family in America you marry a woman. In Russia, WOMAN MARRIES YOU!”

Russian Skank!

Thank you for bring me your country. Now, how you say, I marry good Russian boy.

Man, its times like these when I am glad I married me an American lady. Sure, I know they are hard to deal with. What with their nagging and their “Why do you spend all your time doing that podcast for no money?” and their “stop cursing in front of my mom” and their “I can’t breathe when you stand on my windpipe.” Its not all wine and roses. But at least its not what these guys have going on. These guys want anything but an American girl. I’d say they want someone who they imagine isn’t corrupted by the temptations of the West. Little do they realize that they aren’t corrupted because they aren’t here yet! I mean if they think meeting American hot babes is hard at least they aren’t traveling around the globe to a meet a chick who barely speaks English. THAT sounds hard. But whatever. Just listen to the podcast already, tovarich. Dasvidaniya!

Now you too can waste all your time pursuing fruitless long distance relationships!


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