Lou Reads the Internet for YOU!
Giving Voice to the Things You Didn't Want to Hear About
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: RSS
Frustrated at work? You’ll relate to these stories then. Listen and enjoy as these people share stories of their annoyance with roadblocks of redtape, stupid people and just plain retarded policies on the job.
Lou Reads Stories of Workplace Inefficiency
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: RSS
Yeah, I know, you didn’t need to know that this fetish existed and yet, here you are. This week I am reading from the Dragon Spot forum. It’s a place where people who are crazy for dragons and general animal roleplaying get together to talk about stuff they like…. Like VORE….
Vorarephilia (often misspelled voreaphilia or voraphilia because of their similar pronunciation), also known as phagophilia or simply called vore[1] for short, is a sexual fetish and paraphilia where arousal occurs from the idea of being eaten, eating another, or watching this process.[2][3] The fantasy may include digestion.[3] The word vorarephilia is derived from the Latin vorare (to ‘swallow‘ or ‘devour’) and Ancient Greek φιλία (philia, ‘love‘). (Thanks Wikipedia for being the answer for all the worst things in life!)
My friend Finn feels that people who are into this fetish are just broken. Because there is nothing about being consumed alive or swallowing others that fits into the standard sexual realm. Sure, there is often sex involved, as you will soon hear, but seriously its almost always some interspecies rape thing that ends with one of the people being eaten. Also note that the eating is not always via the mouth. I’ll bet you didn’t know that cocks and assholes can eat people, too. Oh you didn’t know that? Thats because you are not an insane person. Please enjoy listening to the not mind safe insanity that is a click away!
Lou Reads about Vorarephilia
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe: RSS
Please enjoy these two clips from a PBSKids thing I was asked to record for. Unlike with the James Patterson thing, when they asked for a scratch track and then used it for free on national television, I got paid for this one. I had recorded a scratch track for the client and they liked it but went off to get someone else to read it for them. I was just about to head home when I got a phone call from the recording studio. They hadn’t liked any of the talent they hired and the client wanted me to come in for a professional read. This is the result.
BIZARRE PBS KIDS
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: RSS
Hello, friends. This is a commercial I did a scratch VO for. That means I worked at a place and they asked me to record a track for timing. In theory later they’d hire someone to do the “Professional” voice over and pay that person a lot of money to do so. Well they decided to just air what I made and not pay me anything. I tried to get my boss to ask them for money but he didn’t want to rock the boat with the client. The spot ran every morning on the Today Show for like 2 weeks. Then suddenly it started popping up with someone else’s voice track. Then it was gone.
JAMES PATTERSON OWES ME MONEY!
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: RSS
Hey, you probably like to go to Six Flags now and then. Who doesn’t? Well no matter how hard you try to enjoy yourself at one of those places the fact of the matter is that you’re going to run into a substrata of human that you don’t normally encounter. These are the failures of humanity. People who just suck in an almost unfathomable way. Whether they are cutting the lines, talking shit about a pretty sunset or just being gross, dumb, ugly people fucking up your experience with their subhuman antics!…. Ahem… I seem to have gotten a little beyond the scope of this podcast. Anyway, these are a just a few of the stories included in the Something Awful comedy goldmine thread entitled “Failures of humanity witnessed at amusement parks”
Tales of Failures of Humanity at Amusement Parks
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: RSS
Some old book says “Love thy Brother” Maybe it was a bible of some sort. Wherever it came from I doubt they meant incest. Yes, you guessed it. This week is about the ultimate super nasty, mega-taboo topic of inter-familial sexual relations. Once again as a participant in the weekend web sojourn to the land of incest related forum reading I exposed myself to some seriously awful garbage and then recorded it for your grimacing pleasure. If these people are telling the truth then there is a lot more consensual incest going on that I thought. And I sincerely thought the number was like 0.0000000000000000000… there aren’t enough zeros really. Just imagine some kind of very long row of zeros going to the vanishing point and beyond the horizon there is a lonely number one. Alright, put your headphones on. This shit is gross!
EDIT: I just re-listened to this episode and it’s seriously insane. ENJOY!
JOURNEY TO THE INCEST ZONE